Ollie
This is a fanfiction of Universal Kids' The Ollie & Moon Show. Chapter 1: Tarzan Moon One morning, Moon was looking through the depths of the Dress-Up Chest. Stanley showed up to ask Moon for something. "...Have you seen my mints, Moon?" "Sure, go into the kitchen." "Thanks," said Stanley, and left to find his mints, leaving Moon to find... something in the Dress-Up Chest. As she looked through the mermaid costume and knight armor, she saw it: A furry brown toga with black spots. "BRAINSTORM!" she exclaimed, making Stanley fall to the ground with the mints he found. During that time, a delivery truck pulled up to Ollie and Moon's apartments. The driver holding a large package rang the bell. Ollie swung the door open and scatted as he danced his way to the elevator. He went in as the large silvery doors close. Inside the carpet-y interior of the elevator, Ollie stood inside as he listened to an instrumental elevator music piece of Funny Buddies playing. "That sounds familiar," he said. "Ah, well." The doors open at the lobby. "Morning, my good man," he said to the bellhop St. Bernard. "Morning," the big dog replied as Ollie opened the door to see the delivery hound dog with... "MY CUPBOARD!" Ollie screamed in excitement. He wrote some stuff down on the hound's clipboard, and sent him to drive away. He went back in the apartment and took the same elevator back up to his room. He opened the box by unfolding it, revealing said cabinet in whole instead of in pieces and some painting materials. He looked up and saw some strange green vines hanging from the ceiling. "It's better not to touch it to find out," thought Ollie to himself. Some time later, Ollie was half-finishing painting his cabinet, and was so careful, he didn't get a drop of paint on him. "What a quick and easy job," he said. "Look at these drums I got from the dollar store, Ollie!" cried Stanley with a group of tropical drums, some members of his snail family, a caterpillar, a grasshopper, and a tarantula. "From the top, guys," he said to his bug friends. Then he and they all started playing a catchy African, tropical tune on the drums. A music reviewer watched the performance and made a positive review on it, saying it gave him an Ice Age/Bananas in Pyjamas vibe for some reason. Anywho, Ollie kept painting his cabinet carefully to the music as he pretended to wave a conductor's baton around. Just then, by sheer coincidence, Moon dressed in the spotted toga she found earlier swung the door open as she swung on the vines hanging from the ceiling, bellowing like Tarzan. "So that's what the vines were for," said Ollie. He banged his head on the cupboard. "OW! Moon! What's going on here?" "I'm pretending to be Tarzan, Ollie," said Moon, still swinging around. Chapter 2: Stanzilla Chapter 3: Too Much Vacation "Okay," said Scoot to Moon, Stanley, and Auntie Char in the car with them. "Everyone set?" "Are we forgetting something?" asked Auntie Char. "Now, don't tell me. I know it's a cat with a name. Kevin? No." "WE FORGOT OLLIE!" cried out Moon and Stanley, but afterwards, Ollie came out of the apartment with his luggage and camera. "Sorry I'm late, everyone. Got the camera, and my bags, too." "I hope we take lots of pictures, Ollie!" said Moon. "Don't worry, gang," said Auntie Char. "Oh, there will be lots to take pictures of,'' I'm sure." "You betcha," said Scoot. "A whole week in our mountain cabin." "No crowded beaches..." said Ollie, cuing a flashback where they were at a beach where too many people were bugging them. "No tourist traps..." cuing another flashback of the gang hanging upside down in ropes while they're forced to watch a clown steal their money. "No, Ollie," said Scoot, "This year, we'll be living off the land." "Catching fish for breakfast using your bare hands," said Auntie Char. "Picking delicious rare berries for lunch," said Ollie. "I've even heard of cheeseberries," he drooled. "And the mountain views will be spectacular," added Moon. "Yes, siree," said Scoot. "This is going to be..." "The best vacation ever!" everyone said at once. Let's hope they weren't wrong. Chapter 4: Horse-Sitting Moon was singing Habanera from George Bizet's opera Carmen. She wasn't singing too well. "Moon!" said Ollie slightly irritated. "Sorry, Ollie." Ollie went back into his apartment room to watch more TV. "Education. No thanks. I already work with-" he said as he changed the channel to SpongeBob SquarePants, who interrupts him appropriately. "EDUCATIONAL TELEVISION?! OH NO! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" Ollie changed the channel. "Puppets. Uh-uh. Aerobics. Okay." Ollie then started exercising, bending, and stretching, until Ollie pulls an arm muscle. "Okay. Forget that." He changed the channel once again. "Wrestling! Cool!" Ollie could hear Moon swinging around pretending to be Tarzan again. "Come on, Moon, wrestling!" "Yeah!" said Moon bounding out in her normal clothes with breakfast cooked by Chef Pawpaw. "Wrestling? Cool!" said Chef PawPaw, then Auntie Char, then Stanley, who both watched wrestling with Ollie and Moon. Ollie was deciding on his breakfast. "Should I take the donuts, or the Colon bran cereal? 'Colon' bran? Okay, I'll take the donuts." He saw Moon eating her cereal with drinking soda. Meanwhile, Mr. Wolfe is trying to relax in his sofa, but he couldn't from Moon's opera singing, then Tarzan yelling, and now the wrestling program. He grumpily got into the elevator to Ollie's apartment room. "Ollie, Moon!" he shouted. "It's Mr. Wolfe!" said Auntie Char. "Let's cheese it!" said Chef PawPaw. "Are we having cheese?" "Yes!" "Okay!" Both cats ran into Moon's apartment room. "Oh, hi, Mr. Wolfe," said Ollie nervously. "What are you doing here?" asked Moon. "Didn't you buffoons know? I'm leaving New York for the weekend." "Really?" asked Moon. "Where are you going? France?" "Moon, how could I possibly drive from New York to France for the weekend?" "I don't know, you've got a map...Can I go with you?" "NO!" "Okay." "I just wanted to know if you two were responsible for taking care of my apartment room for me while I'm gone." "Couldn't you just take Moon with you?" "Look, Ollie!" she said with donuts on her eyes. "I can see you through my donuts! Woooo-hoooo-woooooo!" Mr. Wolfe looked at Ollie with irritation and threat. "On second thought," said Ollie, "she can help me." "Can I help, too?" said Stanley. "You too, Stanley." "Now I'm expecting you three to take extra special care of my pet horse, Bones, while I'm gone." "Bones?" asked Moon. "He must be starving," said Ollie. "You have a horse?" said Stanley. "Yes. As if it wasn't obvious enough, escargot." Stanley hid in his shell. "Well, I made you a list that tells you when to feed him, how to feed him, what to feed him, how to clean his paddock, how to sing to him-" "Sing?" said Ollie, confused. "Sing?" said Moon, excited. "I am counting on you two kittens to take proper care of Bones. Any questions?" Ollie, Moon, and Stanley were silent, until Stanley spoke up. "Does he like glue?" "STANLEY!" Mr. Wolfe snapped. "THAT IS NOT FUNNY!" Mr. Wolfe dialed Bones the Horse. "Listen, if Stanley said something about you, he didn't mean it. He's just a silly snail, OK?" Whinnying can be heard on the other end. "Yeah, I love you too, Bones. Bye-bye, now." He hung up. "Silly?!" said Stanley to Ollie and Moon. "I'm off to my car, now. Here's my key. Remember, go to my apartment room and take care of my horse." "Okay, bye, Mr. Wolfe!" said Ollie, Moon, and Stanley. Auntie Char and Chef PawPaw had the three friends join in a group hug. "Bye!" said Auntie Char and Chef PawPaw. "Bye," said Ollie, Moon, and Stanley. The three friends made their way to Mr. Wolfe's room. They looked out the window as Mr. Wolfe drove away in his car. "Well, he's gone," said Ollie. "Just us," said Moon. "Here, all alone for the whole weekend," said Stanley. "Just the three of us." "You and I," said Moon. "We can make it if we try," said Ollie. "The three of us?" asked Moon. "You and I," said Ollie and Stanley. Later, Ollie, Moon, and Stanley sitting on the couch were filling their guts with ice cream. "Ollie?" asked Moon. "Moon?" asked Ollie. "I can't eat any more ice cream." "I can't either." "Me three," said Stanley. "I'd better just put the rest of it our freezer." "Good idea," said Ollie and Moon. Then Stanley left to put the ice cream in Ollie's freezer where Auntie Char and Chef PawPaw would help him. Meanwhile, back in Mr. Wolfe's room, Moon slowly got up, but as for Ollie... "Moon?" "Ollie?" "I can't get up!" "Hang on," said Moon as she went back to pick Ollie off of the couch. "Ollie, I'm not eating ice cream for a while. I can't. I..." "Wait a second," said Ollie, "It's time to feed Mr. Wolfe's pet horse." Ollie and Moon trekked their way to Bones' pet room. Moon still wasn't getting over the ice cream. "I just can't," she groaned. When they got there, they found a large horse shape lying under a blanket in the bed. "Awww." "Aw, look, he's sleeping," said Ollie. "Hey, Ollie." "Huh?" "I know horses sleep standing up and on their sides, but I didn't know they could sleep while they look like they're doing yoga!" "...Moon?" "Yeah?" "I don't think horses do sleep while they look like they're doing yoga." "Then what is ''he ''doing?" Ollie looked at Moon, then looked at Bones. "Bones? Bones? 'AH, 'Bones!" He proceeded to bang Bones' bed. "BONES! GET UP, BONES! PLEASE, GET UP!" "I'M GOIN' HOME!" cried Moon. "HEY! YOU STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE!" shouted Ollie before lifting up the horse wrapped in the blanket. "Bones? Come on, Bones! Please, Bones!" Some of the blanket came off, revealing a skeleton. Moon noticed."Oooooooh! I think he's-" Ollie exclaimed at Moon, interrupting her. "Don't say it. Mr. Wolfe's had this horse for 10 years! He's probably playin' a joke on us or somethin'." "But-but, Ollie, I..." Ollie exclaimed at Moon, interrupteing her once again. "Okay, Bones, ha, ha. Ha, ha! The joke's over, now! You can get up now. Ha, ha, ha, ha!" "Ollie," said Moon as Ollie laughed once more. "I don't think horses play jokes on people, okay, that is wrong, okay? That is VERY wrong!" "NOTHING'S..... wrong!" Ollie's eye twitched. "Ollie! Bones is dead!" "NO! No! Alright? He's just... in a coma or something, yeah, we can do something! Yeah, that's right, I'll give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, come on!" said Ollie as he took the skeletal horse out of the blanket. "What are you doing, Ollie?" asked Moon. "ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! BREATHE!" He tried doing mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to Bones. He checked for a pulse, then repeated the process. "Ollie, come on!" said Moon. "NO!" Moon grabbed Ollie who had turned into a basket case. Ollie held Moon back. "Don't look, Ollie!" said Moon. "Let it out, let it out. Let it out." "WHYYYYYYY?!" Moon finally let go of Ollie. "So, what are you gonna tell Mr. Wolfe?" Ollie turned to Bones the horse who's made of nothing ''but bones. The skull fell off. When Stanley came back, a high-pitched girly scream was heard. "Moon, what's wrong?!" asked Stanley. Moon pointed to Ollie who was panicking. He almost crushed Stanley when he ran out of Mr. Wolfe's apartment room. Moon picked Stanley up while running out, following Ollie into his apartment room. Ollie unlocked the door with his card key frantically and quickly, and barreled into his apartment room. He threw the closet door open, sending things crashing down, including his big bag. He flailed around with his big bag before managing to unzip and open everything. He ran around throwing away things into his big bag. "What are you doing, Ollie?" asked Moon. "Did you have a brainstorm?" "Yeah, I had a brainstorm, Moon! But we're not having a vacation! All three of us are moving! Auntie Char and your PawPaw are coming with us if any of us want!" "Where are we moving, Ollie?" "I don't know, Moon! California, Wisconsin, Japan, Jupiter, wherever Mr. Wolfe isn't!" "No, no, no, Ollie!" said Moon. "Ollie!" "Don't try to stop me!" "Why are you in such a hurry? Mr. Wolfe is gonna be back by tomorrow night." "I know. If you and I start running now, we'll be a good... 36 miles from home by then." "Y-Y-You can't run to Japan!" said Moon. "Or Jupiter!" said Stanley. "I have to try! I know my chances are slim, but I have to try!" "You can't swim, Ollie!" said Moon. "I said, 'my chances are slim'! You know how much I don't like water, Moon! I-" At that moment, a glass of water spilled on him. Suddenly, the phone rang. "Don't answer that!" Moon picked up the phone anyway. "Hello, Ollie, Moon, and Stanley speaking." Ollie spazzed out for a brief moment as he heard Mr. Wolfe's voice talking over the phone. "Moon? Yes, let me talk to you, Ollie, and that Stanley fellow of yours." "Actually, Ollie owns him." "Still revolting." "It's Mr. Wolfe," said Moon to Ollie and Stanley. "Tell him we moved!" "We moved." "Moon, just put Ollie and Stanley on the phone for me!" "Yep," said Moon. "He didn't fall for it." "NO DUH. ''GIVE ME THE PHONE, CREAM-COLORED DIP! Hello? Mr. Wolfe? ...You're the best neighbor in the world." "Thanks for the appreciation, Ollie. I needed it. How's everything?" "Oh, everything's just fine, y-y-you're the best neighbor in the world." "You just said that. How's Bones?" "Oh. He's...very...peaceful." "Good, good, put him on the phone." Ollie put the phone down and turned to Moon and Stanley. "He wants to speak to Bones." "But... Bones is dead," Moon and Stanley replied. Ollie flipped out for a brief moment once again. "I KNOW that! I'm sorry. I know what I'll do! I'll do my best horse impression into the phone. How's this? Wee-snaw." "Not gonna lie to you, Ollie-" said Stanley. "No," said Moon. "I'll handle this Stanley. It's terrible, Ollie." "I knew it," said Ollie. "OLLIE!" shouted Mr. Wolfe on the phone. "You do it, Moon!" said Ollie, giving the phone to Moon. "Whinny, neigh, any horsey sound!" Moon then proceeded to do a spot-on horse-like sound into the phone. "Ha!" said Ollie to Mr. Wolfe. "Did you hear that?" "No, a truck rolled by. Have him do it again." "KKHHH-uh-KKHH-WHAT'S THAT, MR. WOLFE? KKKKHH-We got a bad connection-KKKKHH-I can't hear you-KKHH!" Ollie put his goldfish into a glass full of water before putting the phone in the fishbowl. "Bye, Mr. Wolfe." Ollie groaned. "Mr. Wolfe is gonna kill us." "WHAT?!" said Moon and Stanley. "WHY ARE WE GOING?!" "Because if I'm going down, I'm taking you two with me! Along with Auntie Char and Chef PawPaw, of course. Wait, wait, wait. I know what we can do." "Yeah, Ollie," said Moon. "We're not moving to Japan with you." "Or Jupiter," added Stanley. "No!" said Ollie. "I'm saying, we go to a pet shop, and find a..." Ollie went into Mr. Wolfe's room to investigate Bones. He came back and said, "...palomino horse that looks exactly like Bones." "Then, what?" said Moon. "Then, we put the horse in the paddock, and pray that Mr. Wolfe doesn't know the difference." "You think that'll work?" "Well, if it doesn't," said Stanley, "then we are gonna have a lot in common with Bones." "But isn't Bones dead?" "Yes," said Ollie. "Now run them all together, please." Moon thought for a while, then made a mad dash to the entrance of the apartment, then Ollie and Stanley followed suit. They ran into the pet shop. They stopped to cringe at the stinky pet smell. They kept entering and saw a lot of animals from farm animals to jungle animals. Moon was playing around in the jungle animals area when she saw a boa constrictor. "Hey, Moon!" said Ollie, pointing to the "DANGER: BOA CONSTRICTOR" sign. "Leave that snake alone, can't you read?" "I know what I'm doing, Ollie," said Moon. "Fine. You look at that snake, I'm gonna check out the horses in the farm animals area." Moon picked up the boa constrictor. "Hi, snake! I'm a cat! Do you like cats?" She imitated the snake. "Hello!" said the pet store owner. "Welcome to Cheapest Pets in Brooklyn, how may I help you?" "I'm looking for a horse," said Ollie. "Oh, well we have all kinds of horses here." The three looked and saw the boa constrictor wrapped around Moon's neck. "Help!" she choked. "The boa's constricting me!" "Moon!" said Ollie. "Stop playing with that snake!" "I'm not playing with the snake! The snake is playing with me!" The pet store owner ran over to pull the boa constrictor off of Moon's neck. Moon tried to get her breath back as Scoot put the snake back. "I think he squeezed my uvula." "So," said the pet store owner. "What kind of horse do you want?" Ollie walked up to Scoot with a big box. "We want a palomino horse that looks like... Um..." He opened the box, revealing Bones' skeleton. "...this." The pet store owner freaked out. "You want ''that ''kind of palomino?" "Yes," said Moon, "Only not dead." "Yeah, do you have a palomino horse that looks just like this?" asked Ollie. "Well, I do have a horse. Of course," laughed the pet store owner. Ollie, Moon, and Stanley laughed, as well. "No laughing matter," said Ollie. "Well, we have a palomino horse right here." He showcased a palomino horse. "Moon!" said Ollie. "This palomino horse is so light-colored, it looks exactly like Bones did!" "You're very lucky to find a horse like this one." "Why's that?" "Because this is not an ordinary palomino horse. See the white belly?" "What's so special about a white belly?" "There's no other cheap palomino horse in the state with a white belly. It only costs $10." Ollie gets surprised, then turns to Moon. ''"''MOON!" 'he said through gritted teeth. '''"YOU DIDN'T BRING ALONG 10 BUCKS?!" "I was in a hurry!" "Well, we'd better hurry!" "Don't worry, guys," said Stanley, "I know someone who knows 10 bucks." "You do?" both Ollie and Moon said. Soon, they were at the department store being loaned one $10 bill by their dog friend, Scoot. "Thanks, Scoot," said Ollie as he and Moon rushed out with Stanley. "But wait!" said Scoot. "You forgot your box of..." Ollie, Moon, and Stanley left the big box behind. Scoot opens it and freaks out when he sees Bones' skeleton. Ollie, Moon, and Stanley returned back to their apartment and rushed into Mr. Wolfe's room with the new palomino horse. "Wow, Ollie," said Moon. "I can't believe we spent $10 on a horse. Do you think that's too much-" "Gee, Moon!" said Ollie. "I didn't know you were on Mr. Wolfe's side! Oh, well! I guess we should tell him the truth!" "You know, $10 isn't that bad." Chapter 5: Camping at the Central Park Zoo Chapter 6: Ollie and Moon Go to Jail Chapter 7: Ollie Goes Viral Chapter 8: Camping in Transylvania Chapter 9: Turkey Day It was Thanksgiving Day in Brooklyn. The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade was on its way to Ollie and Moon's street. Speaking of Ollie and Moon, let's check on them, shall we? A roasted turkey was laying out on the stove. Also, there are two vultures inside the apartment for some reason. The turkey must have too much gravy. "SHOO!" chanted Ollie and Moon to the vultures. "That's not your turkey! That's our turkey!" said Ollie. "Don't you have the Moronic Idiot Vulture-Con to go to?" said Moon as the vultures flew out the window. Stanley noticed Ollie and Moon staring at the turkey. "Don't breathe on it, guys." "Right, Stanley," they said. "We gotta wait for the family to get here." "We know, Stanley." "Good." "Wait," said Ollie, "Why are we eating with our families?" "Because we're best friends, Ollie," said Moon. "Oh yeah," said Ollie, "I forgot." "Yeah," said Stanley, "everyone's gonna be here, me, you two, Auntie Char, PawPaw, Ollie's mom and dad, Moon's ''mom and dad, my snail family, and Moon's Aunt Gertie." Both Ollie and Moon groaned in disappointment. "What's wrong with Aunt Gertie?" "Nothing..." said Moon. "Aunt Gertie has a full-grown mustache," explained Ollie. "I do agree, Ollie," said Stanley. "Even though it is hard to eat with a cat who looks like she has a hairy caterpillar on her lip..." Stanley laughed. "You should still be nice to your family. No matter cat or snail." "Or dog?" asked Moon. "...Yeah..." said Stanley, then Ollie. "Scoot is coming here after all," said Stanley. "Okay....Can we shave Aunt Gertie when she gets here?" "Not even Ollie will shave Aunt Gertie," said Stanley. Ollie looked at the razor and shaving cream in his hands. He threw them away. "Sorry. I definitely need some learning." "Now," said Stanley, "I'll be watching the parade while it's being recorded on the special DVR." "Okay," said Ollie and Moon. "You guys set up the table, then I'll help you later." Stanley left the room just in time for Ollie to say out of his hearing, "Happy Thanksgiving, Aunt Gertie, nice mustache." Both he and Moon burst into laughter and fell on the couch. "What is your couch doing in your kitchen, Ollie?" asked Moon. "Sorry," said the couch, and scuttled on his way back to the living room like a crab. "Okay, Moon," said Ollie, "you get the water glasses while I set the table." "Okay," said Moon as Ollie walked into the dining room. "Bye, Ollie!" Moon reached into the cabinets and collected some water glasses. Moon looked at the turkey, then sniffed the turkey's aroma. She leaned in closer to sniff the turkey even more. She took a piece off of the turkey and put it in her mouth. "Delicious! ...Needs salt and cheese." "MOON, COME ON!" called Ollie from the dining room, startling Moon so much, she nearly dropped the water glasses. "AHH!" she screamed. She ran into the dining room to give Ollie the water glasses. "Alright, Ollie, here you go." "Thanks, Moon," said Ollie as he put the silverware and plates down on the table. "Okay, we need bread plates, I'll get 'em." Ollie prepared to go into the kitchen, but Moon stopped him. "Whoa, no, I'll get 'em, Ollie!" Ollie sighed. "Alright, Moon, you get the bread plates while I stay inside thinking about you not breaking them." "Thank you, Ollie," said Moon as she went back into the kitchen. She breathed into the cabinet to not breathe on the turkey. She went into another cabinet for some fondue cheese and salt. She ate another small turkey piece as she put her seasonings down on the counter. She carefully tugs on one of the turkey legs. "MOON, WE HAVEN'T GOT ALL DAY!" Ollie cried from the dining room, surprising Moon once again, making her rip the turkey leg off this time. She tried to put the turkey leg back on. "MOON!" cried Ollie as Moon threw her entire body onto the counter to hide the turkey. "...Where are the bread plates? Forget it, Moon, I'll get 'em." Ollie walked over to the cabinet to get the bread plates. "Grab some soup spoons, will ya, Moon?" said Ollie before leaving once again. "Mm-hm," said Moon, getting off the counter once Ollie leaves. She drizzled some cheese on her turkey leg and sprinkled salt on it, before eating it. Her turkey craving gave in and Moon pulled a chair up, poured all of the cheese and salt onto the turkey, simply said, "I want some," then ravenously chowed down on the whole turkey like a wild cat. Ollie was setting up the plates at the table. "Hey, Ollie!" said Stanley. "Hey, Stanley." "Um, Ollie?" "Yeah, Stanley?" "Aren't you aware that you're setting the table wrong?" "Yes, and what am I doing wrong, pray tell?" "The water glasses go over the knives, Ollie." "Well, Stanley, I say the water glasses go over the-" Ollie was rudely interrupted by some sloppy eating noises from the kitchen. "What is that?" "Yeah," said Stanley, "what is that?" "I'm not sure, but I think I heard that sound before, though. It was on this documentary about wild animals eating a..." His mouth hung open for a while, then changed into an expression of shocked realization. "...NO!!!" he slammed the water glass down. "WHAT?!?!" exclaimed Stanley. Ollie walked up to the door, and broke it open to see a greasy, gravy-covered Moon with a turkey skeleton on top of her. "AH!''" he screamed as he walked into the kitchen. He picked up the turkey bones. "Ohh noooo!" "I'm sorry," groaned Moon. "WHYYYYYYYYYYY?!" screamed Ollie. "The turkey craving took me over." "Do you realize what our families are gonna do to us when they see this?!" said Ollie. "We gotta do something. We gotta fix it." "How are you gonna fix that turkey, Ollie?" asked Stanley. "It's all in Moon's stomach." "I'm just gonna..." Ollie groaned with rage as he grabbed Moon with all his strength, and performed the Heimlich maneuver on her to get her to spit the turkey out. "GIVE ME! THE TURKEY!" he chanted. At last, he groaned and put her down. "Congratulations, Moon, you ruined Thanksgiving!" "Oh, Ollie. I'm really sorry. But I'm having a brainstorm!" "Uh-oh. When you have a brainstorm, that always means I get dragged off somewhere." Chapter 10: An Ollie and Moon Christmas Carol Chapter 11: The Longest Separation Chapter 12: The Big Scooperia